Post by Simon K on Jan 12, 2017 6:13:38 GMT
I have been toying with the idea of Christian faith. I've even been going to Mass at my local Catholic Church. (I was raised Catholic, but then became an atheist, so my toying with the idea of Christian faith has taken me back to what I know best; also, I have a lot of doubts about certain Protestant doctrines such as sola scriptura, so if I was to become a Christian I think I'd have to be either Catholic or Orthodox, and Orthodoxy poses practical barriers in my situation, so Catholic it may have to be.)
That said, I still have my doubts. Maybe someone here can convince me?
I'm not an atheist any more. I believe that God more likely than not exists, that there is a life after death of some shape, form or description, and that there is some sort of objective moral law which exists independently of time and culture and personal opinion.
I tried being some sort of philosophical theist, without making any particular religious commitments (such as in Christianity or Judaism or Islam or Hinduism or whatnot.) But, I found that is a spiritually sterile approach. If I am (like many others) suffering inside, philosophical theism cannot heal that suffering. I realised that it is very unlikely that a successful, supportive spiritual community can be built on a foundation of philosophical theism alone.
So, as much as part of me dislikes organised religion, I feel like maybe it is actually a necessary thing. So, then, which one? Of the major world religions: I tried Buddhism, I discovered I disliked its absence of the idea of God. I also find myself doubting whether the nondualism prevalent in Buddhist and Hindu philosophy is intellectually coherent. I'm no good at meditating. I have a lot of doubts about the idea of rebirth/reincarnation. Finally, maybe this rationally shouldn't matter, but I find the cultural strangeness of Eastern religions a barrier to my acceptance of them.
Of the major religions, that basically narrows the field to Judaism, Christianity or Islam. (Why only the major world religions? Maybe the one true faith is some obscure little cult? I don't see how I can completely rule out that possibility, but there are so many obscure little cults, that even were one of them true, I doubt I would be able to find it).
I have explored Judaism at some length, but I'm not ethnically Jewish and I don't feel any urge to become so. The flaw I see in Judaism as a religion is its ethnic particularity – it doesn't really aspire to be a religion for all humankind, just members of its own ethnic group. It is essentially a tribal rather than universal religion. Given that, I don't see it as a live option for me.
Between Christianity and Islam – Islam feels alien to me and Christianity familiar. Again, maybe that isn't the most rational grounds for picking one over the other, but I can more see myself believing in Christianity than I can see myself believing in Islam.
I used to see Christianity as a bad influence on the history of Western civlization. I now have a much more mature view of that topic – Christianity did the West a lot of good, and those who paint a picture of "religion poisons everything" (to quote Christopher Hitchens) are very selective in the evidence they use to paint that picture. (It is also true that some Christians have done horrible things, and I think some Christians go too far in trying to defend some of the excesses such as the Inquisition, but even if all of that is true, it doesn't in any way disprove Christianity.)
I believe that it is historically probable that Jesus existed, that he was a 1st century Jewish religious teacher, that he was crucified by the Romans, that his followers had an experience (or experiences) after his death which convinced them that he had miraculously risen from the dead, that the community of his followers evolved over the succeeding decades and centuries into what we now recognise as Christianity, and that the Gospels are at least partially based on his teaching. I've studied "Christ myth theory" (as in Richard Carrier) and found it wanting – while I don't think history can decide this matter with certainty, I think the historical hypothesis that Jesus really existed and that the Gospels are based on his life (possibly with some distortions) is more probable than the competing hypothesis that Jesus is a product of some process of mythmaking.
When I was younger, I identified as "socially progressive". I mocked traditional Christian moral teaching, especially on sexuality, as outmoded, hateful, irrelevant, irrational, etc. However, as I've grown older, become a father, and thought more about my own family background and the emotional impact it has had on me – my mother's adultery, her divorce of my father and subsequent remarriage to her partner in adultery – I find myself much more sympathetic towards socially conservative views on marriage and family–the Catholic Church's teaching on the indissolubility of marriage suddenly has an appeal to me that it never had before. (That said, while I am nowadays leaning more in a socially conservative direction, I still retain some of my longstanding socially liberal tendencies.)
So, from my present perspective, Christianity seems to have a lot going for it. Yet still, I find myself unable to "close the deal", so to speak. I can see the philosophical case for theism, I can see the sociological case for something like traditional Christianity as socially beneficial, I can even see the case that I might be happier if I believed, but I just struggle to bring myself to believe the particular claims of Christianity – that the Bible is God's Word, that Jesus is God incarnate who miraculously raised from the dead, etc. (As I said, I think history can demonstrate that it is likely that the disciples had a profound experience which they interpreted as Jesus rising from the dead–but I think that is as far as history itself can go–history must remain agnostic as to what actually happened–to go beyond that agnosticism requires faith–and I just don't have enough of the right sort of faith to overcome that agnosticism.)
Can anyone help me out?
That said, I still have my doubts. Maybe someone here can convince me?
I'm not an atheist any more. I believe that God more likely than not exists, that there is a life after death of some shape, form or description, and that there is some sort of objective moral law which exists independently of time and culture and personal opinion.
I tried being some sort of philosophical theist, without making any particular religious commitments (such as in Christianity or Judaism or Islam or Hinduism or whatnot.) But, I found that is a spiritually sterile approach. If I am (like many others) suffering inside, philosophical theism cannot heal that suffering. I realised that it is very unlikely that a successful, supportive spiritual community can be built on a foundation of philosophical theism alone.
So, as much as part of me dislikes organised religion, I feel like maybe it is actually a necessary thing. So, then, which one? Of the major world religions: I tried Buddhism, I discovered I disliked its absence of the idea of God. I also find myself doubting whether the nondualism prevalent in Buddhist and Hindu philosophy is intellectually coherent. I'm no good at meditating. I have a lot of doubts about the idea of rebirth/reincarnation. Finally, maybe this rationally shouldn't matter, but I find the cultural strangeness of Eastern religions a barrier to my acceptance of them.
Of the major religions, that basically narrows the field to Judaism, Christianity or Islam. (Why only the major world religions? Maybe the one true faith is some obscure little cult? I don't see how I can completely rule out that possibility, but there are so many obscure little cults, that even were one of them true, I doubt I would be able to find it).
I have explored Judaism at some length, but I'm not ethnically Jewish and I don't feel any urge to become so. The flaw I see in Judaism as a religion is its ethnic particularity – it doesn't really aspire to be a religion for all humankind, just members of its own ethnic group. It is essentially a tribal rather than universal religion. Given that, I don't see it as a live option for me.
Between Christianity and Islam – Islam feels alien to me and Christianity familiar. Again, maybe that isn't the most rational grounds for picking one over the other, but I can more see myself believing in Christianity than I can see myself believing in Islam.
I used to see Christianity as a bad influence on the history of Western civlization. I now have a much more mature view of that topic – Christianity did the West a lot of good, and those who paint a picture of "religion poisons everything" (to quote Christopher Hitchens) are very selective in the evidence they use to paint that picture. (It is also true that some Christians have done horrible things, and I think some Christians go too far in trying to defend some of the excesses such as the Inquisition, but even if all of that is true, it doesn't in any way disprove Christianity.)
I believe that it is historically probable that Jesus existed, that he was a 1st century Jewish religious teacher, that he was crucified by the Romans, that his followers had an experience (or experiences) after his death which convinced them that he had miraculously risen from the dead, that the community of his followers evolved over the succeeding decades and centuries into what we now recognise as Christianity, and that the Gospels are at least partially based on his teaching. I've studied "Christ myth theory" (as in Richard Carrier) and found it wanting – while I don't think history can decide this matter with certainty, I think the historical hypothesis that Jesus really existed and that the Gospels are based on his life (possibly with some distortions) is more probable than the competing hypothesis that Jesus is a product of some process of mythmaking.
When I was younger, I identified as "socially progressive". I mocked traditional Christian moral teaching, especially on sexuality, as outmoded, hateful, irrelevant, irrational, etc. However, as I've grown older, become a father, and thought more about my own family background and the emotional impact it has had on me – my mother's adultery, her divorce of my father and subsequent remarriage to her partner in adultery – I find myself much more sympathetic towards socially conservative views on marriage and family–the Catholic Church's teaching on the indissolubility of marriage suddenly has an appeal to me that it never had before. (That said, while I am nowadays leaning more in a socially conservative direction, I still retain some of my longstanding socially liberal tendencies.)
So, from my present perspective, Christianity seems to have a lot going for it. Yet still, I find myself unable to "close the deal", so to speak. I can see the philosophical case for theism, I can see the sociological case for something like traditional Christianity as socially beneficial, I can even see the case that I might be happier if I believed, but I just struggle to bring myself to believe the particular claims of Christianity – that the Bible is God's Word, that Jesus is God incarnate who miraculously raised from the dead, etc. (As I said, I think history can demonstrate that it is likely that the disciples had a profound experience which they interpreted as Jesus rising from the dead–but I think that is as far as history itself can go–history must remain agnostic as to what actually happened–to go beyond that agnosticism requires faith–and I just don't have enough of the right sort of faith to overcome that agnosticism.)
Can anyone help me out?