Neds (with apologies to Tim O'Neill)

[jamierobertson]

To avoid any further hijacking of the Armarium Magnum thread, here is a new place to discuss the evolutionary biology, phylogeny and future ecosystem impact of neds (and their recently divergent cousins, the chavs).

For my part, I'd say that neds will be very difficult to wipe out. Although they have very low intelligence, a lack of basic common sense - when mixed with a dirt-cheap 15% proof alcoholic drink - means they breed at a very high rate, and from an early age. Unstable households perpetuate the problem, and their numbers can increase exponentially.

[humphreyclarke]

At least the existence of Neds cannot be blamed on religion by Dawkins and his acolytes....except maybe those monks at Buckfast Abbey who brewed the tonic wine.

"RITE TROOPS IF YER NO FAE NULSON BIT YER IN THE NULSON AREA POP DOON TAE THIS SHOAP MAN AND IZZY WILL SORT YE OOT WAE EH FINEST BUCKFAST TONIC WINE......WIT TAE DAE IS BOUNCE PAST EH CHIPPY RITE N THEN YEL C ALLDAYS JUST KEEP GAWN MAN TAE YE C A SIGN SAYIN EH MAIN STORE MAN JUST GEE THE thingy A 5 NOTE N THERE YE GO A BOTTO A WINE!"

The answer to all life's problems

[jamierobertson]

Actually, Uncle Dick could try and blame it on religion judging by the number of neds that attended the Orange Walks in Glasgow and Lanarkshire last week. Fine, they were wearing Rangers tops rather than shellsuits, but it's a minor detail. Course, they've about as much faith as my stethoscope, but I suspect he'd still call them "typical religionists".